Saturday, January 2, 2010

may the new year bring all you need

I just skimmed at high speed through my photo's for one that would sum up how i feel about the dawning new year. I had imagined a nature pic, all sky and crashing water, perhaps a sunrise over the horizon. Nope, this is the one that jumped out at me and wouldn't go away.
-Something about the intensity and focus of Jed applying himself to writing reminded me of what i need to launch my projects into the world.
-Something about the fact that he's 'writing' in my healing book/journal...speaks to me of that constant process of growing into being Mama and sharing what is important to me, with him. But still keeping sacred Mama space too. That perennial dance Mama's do.
-There is something about him being naked. I have been reading Clarissa Pinkola Estes' book, Women who Run with the Wolves and have been painfully reminded of all the ways i am contracted, hiding behind, in some ways not letting my whole self dance this life. I got hurt, very hurt, a few years ago now i see how i have been not jumping in, but standing back watching. Still testing the waters. Time to let that rest. The time for thriving is now.

In this picture i see a glimpse of the future, into a small person who actually reads and writes and stands confident and connected without mama physically there as back-up. I am so grateful to be chosen to be guide for this being and i am in no hurry for that growing up thing. I am content to chat to stick insects and pretend to be cats whenever we climb the stairs, or badgers burrowing in the newly made bed for as long as we do.

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